2011

2011 year is to terrible for me,
i was not live happily in this 2011,
the 1st half was all fine, but the 2nd half was like shit,
my emotional control all over me, FUCK MY LIFE AND FUCK YOU!
YOU DESTROY MY LIFE!
i can say this is the suck year ever in my life.
THE WORST YEAR EVER!

''New'' hair style

I've been thinking to go for a hairdo, wanna make some changes on my hair, since Chinese new year is around the corner...

this is my current hairstyle


short hair? straight hair? or curly hair? brown? black ? violet? dark red?
there are only few in my option.

lets the photo tells you my decision..




yeah..i m perming my hair, make it curler and curler~
but end up , it turned out this way


not as curl as i expected..mission failed again
i wondering why everytime i went to perm my hair, the result is always like this,
is my hair's problem or the stylist's problem?
and i blame no one, but just accept the fact!
natural curl=.=, that's all i can explain to myself...



this is the fact, just accept it and SMILE :}

要忘记某些事某些人，其实不难，
但你已经决定，已经放弃，已经绝望，已经死心，
你根本不会放在心上。

放下，
难是难在你犹豫不决，还未放弃，存有希望，还在意，
那你根本就放不下。

我想。。学会放下。。。。

loneliness

have you ever walk alone in a rainy day?
have you ever drive alone in a midnight but you have no place to go?
have you ever feel the loneliness but you are actually quite enjoy it?

i did it all today,
today is a rainy day, and i wanted to go for a walk so much,
the whole park was dangerously quiet, and i m the only one people who walking around the park.
i feel the peacefulness, i feel the silence, and i feel the loneliness..
i ain't afraid of loneliness, not at all, instead i m enjoying it..
silence..it helps to refresh my mind...

i went for a joyride alone, i shouldnt call it a ‘joyride', it should be called a 'lonelyride'
i drove the same road over and over again, i have no direction no destination.
while driving alone,
i listening to songs, i sang out loudly,
and then i off the radio, i heard nothing, i was thinking nothing, i feel nothing,
mind blank, heart blank...
i gave my mind and my heart for a rest....

loneliness, everyone does,
every days and nights are so noisy, so packed , so rush, so stress
when loneliness and silence comes, i feel great....
sometimes i feel like to disconnect with the world..
just wan to be alone for awhile.....cease all the thoughts...

i did it tonight...and the last time was few years ago....
although lonely, but i felt great

Proud to be a M'sian ( Today only )

Malaysia has won the football match today,
defeated Indonesia, everyone was so exciting over the match..
Well..watching football match is not my hobby,
i m ddumb, not really know how to enjoy watching it without placing bet on it...
hahaha..
last time i had once placing bet on FIFA world cup, and i won a cup of Starbuck Coffee from my fren Chlovy Tan, that was my 1st time putting all my attention on the match from the begining to the end...

lets come back to the topic, Malaysia finally won, my friend told me that our national football team is actually doing quite well, of coz not to compare with those famous Europe country..
i didnt watch the match, hmm..but my dad did, before i went out, he told me that the match is started, if Msia won, we might have a holiday..

WOW! i am a little bit mean, what i focus is just the HOliday, hahha.. hoping that the holiday will be declare soon, so i can less one working day...
i think everyone hoping the same thing rite?
everyone is lazy...
KULI are hoping for the holiday, BOSS are worry for the holiday..
i'm KULI! ^^
We WON, Malaysia WON, we WON, Malaysian WAN a holiday! YESSSS!

Fuck My Life

why am i so fucking pissed off, while the person dont even care about it?
i have been asking myself this for the whole night,
over and over again,
the result generated, simple: coz i m stupid.
why are you have such a big influence to me?
hmmp, i know the reason why...

i used to be alone, i used to be independent,
i used to live my life happily,
i taught people not to take everything seriously,
coz it will eventually suffering yourself..
and i experiencing it..right now...

and from now on, i decided not to let everyone ruin my life again,
again and again, stop torturing me , can you?!
this is my life,
i dont fucking care what people did,
i dont fucking care!
please, i am telling myself, not to care everything!

Cycling day @ putrajaya

this cycling activity was planned for quite a long time,

we successfully executed it..(finally..）
we sweat, we laugh, we screamed, we talked, we mad, we gave up, during cycling.

(wow~ early birds can get its worms (directly translated;-)
（guess we are still looks great in the morning, rite?)

and today was my very 1st time to ride a tandem bike,
never thought the feeling is sooooooo damn SCary,
feeling extremely insecure when sitting behind,
i was screaming like hell,
my lady's image was totally spoiled..arghhh!



BUT! I can still handle it very welll...
and, i swear i wont lend a tandem bike again, in the rest of my life!



last but not least, KINDLY look at our rabbit tan hee ling,
she won the award OF ''grestest outfit of the day'' !
she dressed outstandingly for today,
RABBIT CUSTOME!! SO CUTE~

well, we are actually placed every sunday morning as our exercise day,
lets see how long we can do it,
i bet this is the first and also the last....
coz i knew myself and my friends too much>.<..

有些话，
听了很久，
已经不想再听了。。。

有些事情，
期待了很久，
已经开始绝望了。。。

有些承诺，
背叛了无数次，
已经没勇气再去相信了。。。

爱情不能做比较，
才发现，
原来不比较，

真的很难。。。。。。。

心思

何谓心思
对我而言，它，很重要，
一个人愿意花心思在你身上，比愿意花钱在你身上来的重要，来的可贵。
一个人不愿意花心思，时间在你身上，那你也不需为他浪费时间了，是多余的。

一个人肯认真为你而改，肯倾听你的心事，爱你所爱的，
如果他不曾为你改进，不曾了解你，不曾接受你，一味的要做他的大男人，
那，
女人，
真地要保持清醒啊~

stupid clown

can i laugh?
i wanna laugh at you, due to the stupidness of you,
who you think you are, please, never try to over-estimate yourself,
you are not as good as you thought,
try stand on people's side,
dont always think you are the most pitiful people,
and don't act like everyone is bullying you,
such an actor/actress, well, you should be in movie, not in life,
how lucky that you have your fans to support you,
seeing you being a professional actor/actress,
for me..you are just a clown, a brainless clown..
anyway,
good luck in your career..and god bless you

二人同行

用期待加上宽容
在加无止境乐观和等候
以为这些付出等于美好结果
你却说凭什么
我相信你爱护我
只是爱没有想像中的多
对天空的辽阔来说云算什么
你不会懂我渺小得多宽容
爱你不重我要自己不要放开手
不痛不痛 心却独自跳的好寂寞
幸福那一个美梦 是二人同行才有
你渐渐缺席让我被挡在未来的入口
爱你不重尽管我无力再向前走
不痛不痛 就算辛苦的震耳欲聋
爱你我爱到最后 剩回忆这个朋友
爱情从二人同行变成
我一个 默默后承受
我想过很多以后 幻
想过快乐也愉悦心痛
爱就像是偏执的风带我升空
只问前进忘了要怎么降落
爱你不重我要自己不要放开手
不痛不痛 心却独自跳的好寂寞
幸福那一个美梦 是二人同行才有
你渐渐缺席让我被挡在未来的入口
爱你不重尽管我无力再向前走
不痛不痛 就算辛苦的震耳欲聋
爱你我爱到最后 剩回忆这个朋友
爱情从二人同行变成
我一个 默默后承受
爱你不重我要自己不要放开手
不痛不痛 心却独自跳的好寂寞
幸福那一个美梦 是二人同行才有
你渐渐缺席让我被挡在未来的入口
爱你不重
不痛不痛 就算辛苦得震耳欲聋
爱你我爱到最后 剩回忆这个朋友
爱情从二人同行变成
我一个 默默后承受

drink drank drunk

since when i love to be drunk?
since when i love to go pub instead of cafe?
problem existed, people usually choose to escape, we choose to get drunk instead of solving the problem, but when we are sober, the problem is still there, isn't it?
not to deny that getting drunk is a way to release tension, release stress, release unhappiness and everything that you are not satisfied with..
drunk is for those drunkards to seek for a short-term happiness, being easy and relax.
sometimes it is a way to express feelings, sharing can be done easily when people is drunk..i am so happy that my friends always be with me when i m down,upset or maybe lost, they gave me consultation, they gave me suggestion, we shared experiences and opinions. i love you my fellow friends <3

心痛..

曾经的我，是多么的相信你，
但是事实永远是残酷的，
是你让我学会相信，也是你让我知道什么是虚伪，
你的诚实，很虚伪，
你的假惺惺，你给的假希望，让我很失望，
一次一次找理由安慰自己，
只觉得自己很傻，为了你，我几乎放弃所有，
你的背叛，我很心痛，
曾经，你为了这件事责骂我，我感到内疚，
今天才发现，原来你也是一样，你根本没有资格说我，
我感谢上天，给我机会，让我看穿你，
我心痛，我失望，
但是我也很记仇，
你不仁我不义，
你既然做的出，就要敢当，
我很伤心，很失望，
今天我流的泪，你会十赔奉还！
相信我，
我会让你死得不明不白！

IT

its hard and difficult, one down and another one up, how long i gonna get rid of all these, how long still i can reach the destination..i wondering...
i always thought it does not matter, but its actually mattered,
in life, in everywhere...
i need more power and i need support..to fight for it.
but please dont blame me if i give up one day, i dint meant it, i thought i m strong and tough enough to face all these, but actually i m not..i m weak..so weak...

Munakata Japanese Buffet + Caffeinees

we planned to go Munakata japanese buffet for so long,
yeah,we always planned. but never take action,
luckily we have Elles to be a good organizer, we executed the plan eventually...

thought we can have at least 9 persons going for the buffet dinner, but Scott and his pretty princess couldnt make it..so throw us airplane in the end..and left with 7 of us..

yeah..we are here!

Elles booked the whole restaurant for us, no others, just us! *credit to our organizer -Elles*


my 1st favourite : shashimi salmon...

soft shell crab tempura..


my 2nd favourite Unagi..yumyum..
we had a super long chit-chat session, it was about 5 hours of dining+chitchating, until the worker forced us to leave..Girls talked about job n guys talked about Dota =.='' Dota again!


someone stupid asked us to acted like we saw an UFO, erm..? wht do u think?


after dinner, we took about half an hour standing outside the restaurant and think about a nice place for yumcha..
Elson came out with his idea : Caffeinees..!

here's the place...a well-decorated, wholly white, romantic place..once got out from the car, smell cames 1st, Shisha...aiks..i dun like it...so we decided to sit indoor to avoid for that smell cames out from shisha..and we had another chitchat session, it took about 3 hours, again, girls talked about job, and guys continued with their never-end topics -Dota!=.=''


our outing ended with a electrical dance which performed by George, held right at the entrance of Caffeinees..





looking forward for our next outing, maybe by that time, we all are already employed, and guys becoming the expert of Dota and are the representatives of Malaysia * as they always wished*

new life begins...

after so many years,
i couldn't escape of this anymore,
work, is a must for everyone of us,
we cant get rid of this,
this gonna be a part of our life...


i m kind of blur, i dunno which and what to choose,
right or wrong, and everything ..
though there is nothing to be afraid,
learn from mistakes, we all do
dun be afraid of making any mistakes..
i told myself this every time...

I've been hunting for jobs for weeks,
job hunting is a job too, and it is not an easy one,
i went few interviews,
at first i felt it interesting,
but now, its too bored for me to attend an interview session..
been repeating the same thing over and over again..


to learn , to explore, to enjoy
this is what life want us to be...

what's in me?

i was in a bad situation,
both mentally and physically,
as i said, i m not myself anymore,
i meant it,
i cant speak up what i want, what i needed,
i m trying to hide all my feelings inside,
i admit that i m kind of greedy and selfish person,
but then i m also kind of softhearted person,
when i said yes, its actually means no,
why are NO so hard to say?
just because i care, i cares about people's feeling,
i dont want anyone get hurts,
i have thousand things in my mind,
but things came out in opposite way from my mouth,
and this almost break me into two person,
i cant be myself, it isn't me, and i dont know which one is me?
i m very confused, i need someone to consult me,
i hope to stop all this shit, but then i cant..
i wan to be frank, but i choose to tell lies, because i dun wan people get hurts,
i lie myself, i lies to you, and everyone
i need a break, i m seriously tired with all of these....

do you know that?
i wanted for so much..
its more than you can imagine...

healthy"s light turned red!

having an serious infection that caused me did not sleep well for few days.. it was fucking painful, almost cried every night..
I m damn worried about my health actually, I din tell anyone of my family, that how am I suffering for this , I dont wanna let them worry about me!

few day ago I went to clinic, doctor told me it's an infection and asked me to drink plenty of water. and I did it everyday , I drank almost 10 liters of water each day, but it doesn't turn well..and I started worried！I think I better go for body check up before it is too late... god bless me..

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

人生

人生象搭一段长途巴士，
有人上车有人下车，有人陪着你直到终点，
不是我在途中把你踢了出来，而是我选择了在途中下车，
从你的人生走出，
下了车后，会更好，还是想象中的差，我不知道。。。

谢谢你，
那是人生中的一段经历，
一段学习，
一段美好的回忆，
我不会忘记，
若要忘记，也谈何容易
真心祝福你

未来的路我不会走，也不清楚，
只能不断地走下去。。。

a worst week ever!

many things came in once, how i gonna handle all these?
old problems have not settle down , another problems raise..
solution i need solution!

i always believes this...

''when God closes one door, He opens another, or a window. ... because He wants us to go through..''

where is the window? i need to find it out asap..if not everything will be in a chaos..

我的妈妈

妈妈，今天是你的大日子，
很遗憾的，你两个宝贝儿子没能陪在你身边，就连你的丈夫也得在外波工作。

妈妈，你知道你是何等的伟大吗？
曾经的你，也算个游手好闲的少奶奶，
爸爸一度生意失败，变卖了所有的房子和汽车，就连你毕生积蓄也拿了出来，
你的生活也变得起起伏伏了，
从豪华汽车，变为巴士老爷车，
你很坚强，你不离不弃，对爸爸也对我们，
有一段时期，爸爸到国外工作时，一年没回家，你曾经一度扛起我们一头家，
你们肯定没有试过rm15 能吃一个礼拜的菜吧，是三餐哦！我妈妈可做到了！
虽然餐餐粗茶淡饭，包菜马铃薯鸡蛋，肉类是不可能的，
妈妈早上去工作时会炒饭，等我们放学回来有的吃，
有时我们放学回来，炒饭也已经臭了，我们也照吃！
哥，姐，你们还记得吗？当我们放学回到家，一把门打开，
扑鼻而来的臭味吗？？XD


妈很精打细算，即使自己再辛苦一点，也坚持要我们把学业完成，不让我们挨饿，也从不埋怨。
还记得有一次，我和妈妈走路去买菜，买到没钱给巴士费，手拎的很酸，但我们也得用走的，一路上，我吵着口渴，妈妈很心疼，但她也没钱给我买一杯水，她不断安慰着我，说就快到家了。。。。


你们肯定觉得很像在听故事吧，很戏剧性对吧？其实人生如戏，戏如人生啊。。
外人可能不相信，可是我们作子女的怎会不了解呢？

妈妈一路以来，都觉得亏欠了我的大哥，因为他中学一毕业，就得帮家里赚钱，他18岁，就在外头一个人打拼, 没有家里人的陪伴， 自己租了个小小的房间， 大哥很懂事，也很独立，很顾家，很孝顺，每个月都会定时寄钱给妈妈，我们一年也没见他一次，也可能是因为这样，大哥在家并没什么跟我们聊天， 为了家里而不能让他继续升学，这是妈妈一生的遗憾吧，她虽然没说，但我可以感受到。。。也可能因为没什么读到书，也一方面为了赚更多的钱，他做了一个错误的决定，什么事情我就不多说了，当天我们全家看到他时，我们都哭惨了，爸妈应该很心疼吧！


二哥，比较任性，比较叛逆，爱顶嘴，脾气坏，他常常埋怨这埋怨那，可能是不知足吧，他不知道，爸妈能给的其实已经给完他了，妈妈常常被他气得快疯了，但他是很聪明的，但就狡猾了些，总是为了自己的利益，而不理会别人的感受。。以前的我很爱和二哥聊天，觉得他对我很好，可是不知何时，他的个性也慢慢变了，老是找妈妈当出气筒，妈妈有时被骂的流泪了，我很不开心，他在我的日记上出现了很多次，我很在意他，但他一次又一次的让我跟妈妈失望，有好几次，都为他流泪了。。。


曾几何时，大哥跟二哥总是出双入对，感情很要好，但如今的他们却各走各的，一年也没说上一句话， 爸妈也无能为力，妈妈常对他们说，这生你就只有这个兄弟，来生你我互不相熟，又何必斤斤计较呢？妈妈很无奈为何会搞到这种场面。。。


姐姐呢，以前在我眼里的她，比较不成熟，头脑简单，四肢发达，离家出走，搞自杀，什么都做了，她老是觉得家里亏欠了她，老是觉得妈妈偏心，不疼她，其实妈妈对谁都一样，妈妈比较爱护大哥，是因为觉得亏欠了他，妈妈也当然知道你也曾经为家里付出，但你希望妈妈回报你什么呢？但现在的她，改变了许多，比较有思想了，在妈妈的眼里，姐姐比较不会分辨好坏，担心她一次又一次的做错选择。。


而我呢，可说是家里最幸福的，中学毕业后，家境也好转了，爸妈也有能力供我读书，哥哥姐姐也很疼爱我，会帮忙我，当然我也会不懂事的时候，也爱顶嘴，也会任性，但当我任性时，大家都很迁就我，我很感谢，我拥有你们，妈妈唯一对我的期望，应该就是好好读书，考出好成绩吧。。


家人对我来说，是非常重要的，

我很重视家庭，家人的一举一动，都直接影响我，

每个礼拜天的家庭日，我都不会错过，

每个家里成员的生日，我都记牢，

只为了不要错过，能让我们聚集在一起的每个日子。。

可是，我们一家人完完整整坐在一台，一年只有一天，也就是团圆饭的那一天。。

我很珍惜。。。

现在，妈妈也算是挨到了出头天，家境也日渐好转，
我们也长大成人，也该也没什么好担忧的了。。
现在的她，变得好懒惰了，
老是说要辞职，
在家老是看戏睡觉的
哈哈，以前的她，应该累坏了，现在要好好享受懒人时光。。

妈妈，很感谢你一路的栽培，
你让我来到这个世界，体会人生，我很感激，
你的用心良苦，和不离不弃，我很感动，
你无私的奉献，我感受的到，

我的妈妈，
她不会做菜，
可是我们却吃她做的菜而大的，
爸爸常常取笑妈妈，
说她做了几十年的菜，从来没进步过。。。


我的妈妈，
她也不回作家务，
老看她忙东忙西的，可是家里没有整齐过。。

我的妈妈，
爱唱歌，
从以前就告诉我们她要参加ASTRO 的歌艺大赛，
从还没到45岁，讲到过了50岁，
都还在家里看着那个节目！
他唱歌很大声，但不好听，哈哈！


我的妈妈，她是很独特的，
她爱护我们，
我们不是富家千金
但她也把我们当作千金看待，
家里没佣人，
也从不让我们碰半点家务，
即时自己做得再累，也不希望我们双手向她一样粗糙。。
她常说，少女的手，是因该滑润的，是因该零瑕疵的。。。
她也不在意，外人说自己的女儿半点家事都不会。。。
她自己没吃好的，却让我们吃最好的，
水果也会切变，让我们吃，只希望我们健健康康， 肥肥白白。。


我妈妈或许有些自卑，她很少朋友，可以说几乎没有朋友，
她害怕自己不比别人好，可能她害怕被人取笑，
她的朋友，就是我们的朋友，
她常常吵着要和我们一起喝茶，上云顶。

我妈她很可爱，很直接，天真
我也当她是我的朋友，
我们讲话方式也很特别，但旁人会觉得我很没礼貌，对妈妈大小声，
可是我们却是这么沟通的。。。
有时说的话，让我们笑得流眼泪，
我们无所不谈，男女老少，八卦
什么都聊。。

能当你的女儿，是我的荣幸，
现在我能做得，是常常陪在你身旁，
我会用一身来报答你。。我爱你，妈咪


原谅我的自私，总把自己放在第一位，
原谅我的无知，常把你给气坏，让你心疼流眼泪，
原谅我的无能，

因为到此时，还没能让你过更好的日子，没能让你为我感到骄傲。。。。。。

愿天下的妈妈们，母亲节快乐！

常常陪伴着妈妈，总比物质来的有意义吧~

当然，给与关心和物质，是最好不过了>.<

2009 年的母亲节，两年前了，好丑哦=.='

Homemade tiramisu for mom~

2010年也有庆祝，可惜我format电脑时，忘了做back up，2010年的照片全没了

a word can change your life

many things happened on me in once..
i just donno how to face everything, friendship, studies, family relationship..
the way i settle matter might be a big problem...
i shudnt do in that way..
i hurts everyone that cares about me..
i never know how to appreciate it..
they care me, they love me, thats y they lecture me..
i m not good in expressing feeling..
but y so damn hard for me to say a ''sorry''?!
this is the simpest word that can settle down everything..
what makes me so hard to speak it up!!


I"M SORRY....

today is just not my day

i used to be very tolerant, i never want to have argument with friends, how often i will argue with friends?
i was trying hard to defend for myself, because i feel myself is not being respected by u,and people think that is unreasonable for me to defend..i wondering why, when the same thing done by others, it is reasonable, when it done by me, it becomes unreasonable...ahahha..what an unfair world...you did angry before right? when people not respect u? why my anger is unreasonable, but yours are reasonable?

things happened must have a reason, did you ever try to figure out why i have to act that way? i wont act that way without a reason rite??? not to be deny that, i did wrong on my part also, i willing to apologize...but please, you have to be understanding also, try stand in ppl's shoes, try stand on other's point of view before come out with your words.. respect others and care about other's feeling...stop being a spoiled kid... no offends k? i m just expressing my feeling as what u usually did..

now only you realized that a simple words can actually harmful and hurts others, haha...try to think, did u done the same thing to others before?? you might say no, coz u never know and we might never tell, or u dont even want to accept it.. people tends to forgiving because they treats u as their love one, maintain the friendship... sometimes u might be joking or whatever, but people wont know, ur face is serious, and ur words are hurtful, what if people take it seriously as u take my words seriously today? does it hurtful?? YES, IT DOES!

i seriously hope you know about it,
to non-stop forgiving is foolish because people would likely just do more of the same as soon as they next had the opportunity, unless the person willing and acknowledge that they have done wrong..
you used to have power over others, comply with you..try think about it, are you allowing others to have power over you? always comply with him/her?
NOT right?! u wont be happy when ppl controls over u, coz we all have our own opinion and own way of doing things! what for u still wan others to comply with you...? try to respect others..be respected, that is essential....

i willing to apologize for i have done to you today, i'm so sorry, but please, try to accept when people critisize on you, accept when you done something wrong, dont push the responsibilites to others, no one is perfect, just be responsible, caring and understanding...
i hope this wont affect our friendship, i wrote this is just to let you know, if u dont feel like to accept it or u think what i said above is totally wrong, then u just ignore this...and behave as usual..

again, no offends k? this is the 1st time i express out my feelings u know??
i m not intend to make thing worse...please stay calm n dont be mad ya.. XD
tomorrow will be a brand new day for me and for u ( you might not read this also)
update ur blog la! make it active

looking forward for my 1st taiwan trip

this gonna be my very 1st time to travel taiwan~
kinda excited~ i'm going with my bestie Chlovy Tan, we planned to go there for quite a long time, eventually we booked the flight, and makes the thing real!
wondering how our trip would be, we just aim for shop only, non-stop shopping,
but none of us doing research, chlovy busy her midterm, and i m busy with my studies also..XD.wad a excuses!
just two of us going, parents kindda worry about our safety, but i think its ok,
i guess we shud know how to protect ourselves...coz we are already 22!
few days ago, dad gave me a call from singapore, and told me about there is a flu virus caused about 80 ppls dead in taiwan, this news seriously shocked me, dad asked me to cancel this trip,
haiz..i dont feel like cancel it, i feel like going still...
hope this virus wont getting serious...god bless us!

Waiting for Result

opps! college announced that our result is going to release within this week
i m feeling extraordinary anxious and worried,
because last semester i was busy playing,
didnt really pay much effort on my studies,
hope the result wont be so bad
i didnt ask for much, let me pass all the paper will do!
wish me luck guys! god bless us!

2011

已经有好久好久没上部落格了，

不知不觉，已经踏入2011年，明年就是2012了，不知世界末日是否真的会来临呢？！

转眼间，以前还是天真无知的我们，也踏入了成人的世界，背负的责任是一年比一年的重，

压力也一年比一年来得多，笑容似乎也越来越少了。

新年去了朋友家拜年，朋友的妈妈说，明年要看到我们各个要带着男朋友来，似乎她开始担心女儿找不到男朋友，嫁不出去，说实在的，并不是没有，而是不要，因为看的人越多，条件就会越高。

其实，朋友的妈担心也是没有错，因为女人青春是短暂的，美丽也不是永恒的，俗语也只有‘钻石王老五’ ， 男人越老越值钱，女人越老越赔钱！

我向来都是个很好胜的人，从不觉得女人会输给男人，而我也觉得男人并不可靠，毕竟靠山山倒，靠水水流，倒不如靠自己，最好！但是历年来，我的生活费，还是靠着家里的男人支撑，很矛盾吧！

现代的女性，多半都是单身的，男人，再也不是唯一能让女生依靠的东西了。其实，再强的人，她应该也会希望有人可以让她依靠吧

妈妈常说我的个性很不好，要改这改那，其实我没完全听进耳，因为我就是我，重来没有想过要改变什么，说我任性，不懂事，固执也好，因为我认为这就是我。

我人缘也不太好，妈说我老是一副臭脸，看到的人都害怕了，哪还敢上前一步说话呢？！ 我不主动，也不好谈，脾气坏，不爱接受批评，不听他人劝告，没责任感，不爱热闹，不爱分享，不诚实...爱放飞机～

其实今年二十二岁的我，是该好好反省了，因为长大了，没有人会宠着你，让你任性了。

也该开始要好好为未来的日子做些打算，总不能永远带着‘过一天算一天’的心态过日子吧。

在这新的一年里，我希望我能努力的改变自己，也别再浪费时间，好好规划自己想拥有的人生！