a mask

am i thinking too much? am i jus the way too negative thinking?

everyone seems like wearing a mask

and acting infront of people every single minutes..

i always told myself that should not put so much expectation on everything, which is inclusive of people..because high expectation will always leads to a high disappointment..

that is why i seldom take everything in to heart..

and this is why i get to live my life happily, at least until this moment..

people who seems to treat you nicely, but maybe it is without their sincerity..and might hurts u eventually..

acting and being fake, i not sure what is their objective of pretending..

but for sure it is for their own sake and it would not be a good thing behind the mask..

i should have knew it earlier..

this is call reality, when you noticed that eveyone is being so fucking fake that time, you would realised your sincerity to them is just a shit..fucking smelly shit..and it is totally unworthy to do so..

Since everyone is being so selfish, then why not just treat yourself better?

KoSE LotioN

bought this one last few weeks..

was finding some new toner to use..

coz mine ard finished..

and this have been recommended by my bro's gf and also my darling Chlovy..

both of them strongly recommended this to me..

its a bit costly, i hope it is works well to me..

at first i was thinking to buy a smaller size and try

but the top sales KOSE's promoter said this month had a great promotion..

which is buy a bigGEST bottles of this lotion and grab 5X points..

once you collected 1000 points in the end of the year

there will be a free gift to you..

i dunno how much points the lotion is after 5x..

but she said left few hundreds points more then i will be stand to get the free gift from KOSE,

guess i still have to buy few more products from her in order to get the few hundreds points..

wad a good marketing strategy to boost up their sales..

Well, i used it for few weeks ard..seems nothing improvement,that means?

still ACCEPTABLE, at least my skin not getting worse..^^

Self-Examination

Still remember all the day they we went through..
Still remember all the thing we did together..
Still appreciate the loves u have given to me..
but i never forget how the tears flows down on my face..

You would never know what i'm thinking...
You might thought i'm doing something silly or maybe childish..
You might think it is doesnt a matter, but for me, it is..
You might angry because of my headiness and immaturity..
but i'm more angry myself because of my stupidity..

I do have my own principles..so do you..
I likes to be secretive and you knew it..
I used to hiden all my feelings..and hope you wont unmask it..
if you've got successfully unmasked it, its offending and you are actually entering my privacy..
so if you knew it, please jus keep it..and act like dont know everything..

Yes, everything happened must have a reason..
if i am the reason, then you would never have the chance to know it..
So please stop asking..
though its unfair to you, but nothing is fair in reality..

I still remember someone hav told me that i will be facing a lunacy problem in the future..
I was laughing badly when i heard it..i thought its kind of stupid and unreal..
but day by day passes,
I started to believes in it...
because i loves to keep all the things in my mind..
I will get crazy once its filled..

--

Thailand trip 28/8-31/8

Hatyai is a peaceful place in thailand, thai are so respectful, they welcome every tourist with their smile and famous greeting ''sawaddeecap'', haha..frankly speak, thai language is a bit funny and it sounds like bad words to me..because mostly their language must have '' lan'' n ''hai'' in a single sentence, although its a bit rude, but its their language, we have to respect!

i went to Hatyai with my mom,some of my frens and some aunties uncles..we've visited uncountable temples during this trip..me and my mom not really know how to do worship properly, so we were just walking around all the temple, and snapping photos. we went Dragon temple, La zha temple, Guan Yin temple, Tai Yang temple..etc..

Birt's nest is selling cheap in Thailand, one bowl is costing only 200 bahts= Rm20..but i guess its in low quality..haha..but we were still willing to pay for it since its quite cheap...

Aqua show is one of the famous activity in Thailand, Well, i didnt get to watch the show, because my mom dont want to go, impossible i leave my mom stay alone in the hotel, so i decided to be company with my mom..my friends and other teenagers went to the show, i got some feedback from them, they said the show was just so adult, get wht i mean? erm, al AQUA were all naked in the show and having sex on the stage, a bit unacceptable for some of our asian, coz we are jus too traditional thinking..one more things, my frens said they have good body figure and good looking, all looks exactly like pretty girls, might even prettier than girl!

Hatyai floating market, its a must place to pay a visit, the view is just too attractive, sellers are all sitting on a sampan and doing their business, its a fabulous place, i love this place so much! seriously! the place is selling various of famous thai snacks, you are get to see their culture and foods there, and all things and foods are selling god damn cheap!

Thai Massage, Oh my gosh, i believes most of the massage addictor could not stand for it, wakkaa, 250-300 baht for 1 hour and 45 mins, its so cheap! but before go for massage, please state clearly that you wanna have a proper massage, because there is a lot of massaging place providing ''special business'', haha, try imaging AQUA help you to do showering? yuackkss, so disgusting!

we went night market by sitting on a ''tut-tut'' car, haha, so cute, actually the car is like our taxi, but with no air-con and size small..their night market is nothing much different with ours, but have a huge different in the price, they are selling all the things very cheap=.=''. most of the sellers are able to speak in mandarin, so you can do bargaining in mandarin when you r interested with their products. although they looks exactly like malay but please, dont speak malay with them, they dont know malay at all..they are THAI, haha

these few days i ate a lot, because every meals is provided, breakfast lunch and dinner, i did not missed out any one of them, plus thai snacks sommore, all foods are too yummy, thats why i brought it all into my body, transform to fats, and took it back to malaysia...aiks, 2kgs gainned..

SummeR BreaK

all of you must be wondering why i could have such a long semester break, its last for 4 months time, oh my gosh, most of my friends are seriously envy me, but if you were me, you would know that 4 months time is not easy to pass and not really enjoyable! its terribly boring and meaningless, everyday stay at home and do nothing besides eating and sleeping. body size getting larger and larger, face become rounded and rounded..just because of this summer break.. dont really know what is this break for...

well, i've tried to seek for some office work, and i got a lot of offer too, but i rejected all of those, due to salary too low, long hours, location is not covienent enough and etc, but i think the main reason is because i'm averse to work! lazy piglet i m! broke broke broke, because of didnt work, no income but still keep on spending, now left one month more..i gained nothing during this holidays except tons of fat..argh! ** i'm still enjoying eating chocolates at this very moment**

one month more, guys, help me to think how to spend this one month time..maybe i should go for some coursE? like dancing? baking? or sleeping?? wakakka~

~A WonderFuL NightZ at 11/7~

i had a great time with all my sista last weekend,though it was really sad when all my sista were busy for their own stuff for quite a time, and forced to neglected our friendship ( it's just what i thought, maybe some of them are intended to neglect it XD)..i got no idea who was the organiser of this so-called secondary school's Sista Gathering, but still credit to the organiser, because it was a wonderful gathering ever, good job and love it!


what do you think when a bunch of girl sit together in a table?? yeah! no others, must be gossip already! feel extraordinary happy while saying people's bad, thats what a girl normally do! apart from that, we had been forced to share our experienced and impressived love history, one by one and no one is excepted!

we taken a lot of photos with different angles, postures, and we had grabbed some accessories from the restaurant..we acted cute, cool and stupid while taking photos and we laughed, we shouted, talked loudly! despite how others will think of us, as long as we had fun and happy to chat with each other, nothing is more important than spending time with da sista!

there is no word to describe how good to spending time with the sista, but i believes the photos below would tells! enjoy~

from left to right: ME!!, heeling, Fish Ng, Kathy Yap, Siew Wen, Chlovy, Jessie, Quennie and Sammine~

looking forwards to our next gathering! i'm sure it will be bringing another surprise for us! Mysterious Organizer, please show up and do something^^

a speech from heart

sometimes, its really hard for people to express out their feelings, for me, i would rather hide all my feelings..i guess most of u guys too..

i was kinda emo recently, i was wondering why i got so much to think, when i was a child, i had nothing, i enjoyed every little single thing, i wanted to stick with my parents all the time, i hugged them while i asleep, i needed their warm when i cant fall asleep, i remembered each time i was waken from a nightmare, i knocked my parent's room, cried infront of them n sleep with them. they will always lended their hand to me while i needed help!

but now, i m an adult! i need to face every problem by my own,i'm trying to settle every problem by my own and a single thing could not completely satisfy me. parents are getting older, and we are hanging out with frens more often, dont wan to stay home? coz we started feel they are nagging for too much! we wants our partner's warm more than our parents. still remember when is the last time u hug ur parents? did u scold them when they were walking too slow? or left them behind? but they never leave u behind when u were a child, they even patiently teach u to how to walk...

u might laughing at me, coz i wrote this kind of shit, wht i wanted to say, is that no matter how tough u think ur life is, there is always a life jacket for u, that is ur parents, no matter how suffer u r working at outside, or living alone.. ur home will still ur warmed-place..

thinking how much patience your parents had paid on u, thn u shud pay how much patience on those thing that u feel yourself have been offended! i was trying hard to control my emotion, even now, something really makes me feel unhappy, but i think it is alright, i dun wan to make thing worse, if things can not be avoided, then i will choose to avoid that thing...
jus to be patient always~

i live for myself, but not others, someday u might get influence by others, but one thing u hv to bear in mind that if u think tht is the right thing , thn jus go for it! whtever others say, its they kind of business! bcoz its ur life! what life u r pursue for and u will deserve it!